Saturday, May 31, 2008

The River Wild

Fact #10 - Kiki spent seven days in a raft maneuvering her way through the Grand Canyon with only a pocket knife, a can of creamed corn, a half-completed New York Times crossword puzzle, and a savvy, monkey companion.

CORRECTION - My crack team of fact checkers has informed me that all that's true except you can replace the pocket knife, the can of creamed corn, and the half-completed New York Times crossword puzzle with Kiki's family. We are still trying to confirm the savvy, monkey companion. Frankly, this author's going to be pretty upset if there wasn't a savvy, monkey companion.

Friday, May 30, 2008

Oregon Trail

Fact #9 - Kiki loves traveling with settlers from Independence, Missouri to Oregon's Willamette Valley. Wanna join her? Too bad, suckface. You don't live in the year 1848. Hold on. Do you have a Facebook page? Then, you can join her. I take back the "Too bad, suckface."

Thursday, May 29, 2008


Fact #8 - Kiki earned the level of blue belt while taking karate when she was younger which is much more impressive than, say, buying a blue belt at

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

"I Don't Like The Cut Of Your Jib"

Fact #7 - Kiki can mean that both literally and figuratively. She taught sailing at a summer camp in Wisconsin. Also, she's very suspicious of people. In conclusion, watch your foresail and watch your back.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Wheel! Of! Fortune!

Fact #6 - Kiki's sister, Kelsey, won 17000 dollars on College Week. That should be just enough money to wash the Sajak off of her.

Side Note - Tens of thousands of Americans have gone home from being on Wheel of Fortune without winning anything. They have no way to remove the residue left from the Pat Sajak-arm-around-the shoulder-"The wheel was tough on you"-good-bye (a.k.a. "The Sajak Attack"). But, there's something you can do. For just one dollar, you can make a difference in a former contestant's life. Go to the following website to find out more.

Monday, May 26, 2008


Fact #5 - Kiki is a Sagittarius but you could probably tell that from her positive outlook on life and how she's so full of energy, versatility, adventurousness and eagerness.

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Dahh DaDa Dahhhhh Dah Da Dahhh

Fact #4 - Kiki is the proud owner of one of only 250,000 virtual Indiana Jones fedoras on Facebook. She's like a lottery winner.

Saturday, May 24, 2008


Fact #3 - Kiki will, in fact, be your huckleberry. (Without the TB and Alcoholism)

Friday, May 23, 2008


Fact #2 - Kiki likes to read books and not just any books; the ones we all didn't read in High School English class.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Colonial Williamsburg

Fact #1 - Kiki wants to go to Colonial Williamsburg more than anyone you know. Anyone.